I am still finding tracks I’ve never heard before, here’s another Smiths cover from the God of Smiths covers and a really cool cameo bit at the end where he pretty much lays it all out for you…. You know, by the time I discovered he was dead I’d already fallen in love with him? It was such a blow to find that my new favorite songwriter had been dead for a year or two at that point. If you do not have a secret stash of Jeff Buckley, then you, friend, aint worth two thirds of shit….
we cooked a meal for the people today, I’ll write about it tomorrow, it’s been a really good day. Touch wood….
fuck. Look. I know I have probably told you this story but it is such a goodie that, well, fuck it.
At the very least we can go back, compare the stories and bring all my lies to light… right?
So… I had this east coast Queen on my arm and we had been traveling around the country during our mid semester break. We went to stay with her Aunty and Uncle in south Auckland. I think we were going to a Big Day Out or maybe to see The Eagles at Western Springs, either way we needed a place to crash in Auckland and Her aunt and her husband were solid drinking buddys from our time in Gisbourne during summers and stuff.
Listen, Ngāti Porou women are nothing to trifle with…
Anyway so we go to the concert and we head back to the place and all is well. We get fed, smoked and drank in that order and reconnect with our favorite holiday uncle and aunt. Now to understand this story you have to know that the Aunt was a full on Ngāti Porou queen but the uncle was this rat bag Rarotongan. Neither of them had higher education but they were both hard working salt of the earth types… Today I bet all their kids are happy healthy and prosperous. I digress. Once we got settled in our room I noticed, as I was drifting off, that the drawers of the wardrobe were labeled… The top one said “Socks” The second one said “Undies” and the third one, gentle reader, said “Pances”. As in “I’ve pissed my pances” or “Put some pances on and fuck off!” That’s my story. If that didn’t make you piss yourself laughing the way that we did then you need to get your funny bone checked…. Xxxxm
ps – yesterday, without a word of a lie I was greeted at my door with a whole mess of police with machine guns. Instinctively I slammed the door in their face and told them to fuck off until they put their toys away. Apparently the new cctv cameras spied on me sitting out on my front step shooting BBs at cans the other night, in my front yard in the dark of night… So they arrived here, three days later with a full on military style swat team. Raided my house, took my bb gun and brutalized me for half an hour in handcuffs. All the while me just berating the fuck out of them the whole time until they let me go. You would have been proud. I was alone at the time I was shooting cans and I would never aim even a BB Gun at a human, its not safe gun practice. I have been shooting at mice and cans for years and never have had that happen to me. Ah the stream of abuse I gave them was quite something. It was absolutely a case of them knowing my priors and finding a reason to put me in handcuffs again for a while, nice and traumatic like. Machine guns! All of them! Like an invading army of mediocre to shit intellects. Fucking stupid blue cunts. Or “Cunces” I should say…..
ppps – ok ok. Fuck. So I omitted the fact that I’d been taking pot shots at the surveillance camera that the local gang had set up at the entrance to their pad next door. Unfortunately it seems they snitched and so I was pounced upon. No stress though, I only wish I’d recorded it… at least 20 minutes of me berating cops for their career and life choices… It must have sounded funny at a distance. Hey friend listen, the entrance to their pad happens to be the same entrance and driveway to my place. I sit out there with my top off when it’s sunny, no-one, anywhere, needs video footage of that. Imagine it with David Attenborough doing a bit about walruses…. fuck them.
I found this today whilst foraging for mushrooms….
Let The West Side Ride Tonight….
xxxm
You know, for every great stride we take as human beings, there always seem to be dudes in uniforms, sometimes horseback, ‘quipped with military grade weapons, willing to impose some kind of order… They often ride shotgun for parades or simply stand around looking evil… When the first men stood on the moon and returned, guess who was in their retinue? It was not philosophers, academics or thinkers… no… it was pigs, everywhere these men appeared, they were accompanied by filth. These are the men and women that for whatever reason decide to make their way through life as bullies. The Police seem to attract these folks. Folks who just love to be in power, in control. They are just as bad as the gangs. They even adapt the same accoutrements. The uniforms and material of war, helmets, body armor, all the standard nomenclature of war and yet deployed against civilians. Modern day Policing is toxic. But it’s a toxicity we all seem to be complicit with. I mean, if it keeps us safe, right? But safe from what?
Hello friend. The Bob’s Burgers franchise has a new feature length film (aptly named The Bob’s Burgers Movie) in which they finally divulge the back story and reasons behind why that one kid wears the fucken rabbit ears all the time! I’ve gotta tell you, compadre, that that one conundrum has had me puzzling my puny brain for years!
That is all.
Mark
ps – i think we should go back to just using pagers and land lines.
Hello Friend, today is my day to cook for the homeless meal. In our city there is a free meal every night at a church down town and once a month and I have been making 30 or 40 meals. I package them all up and someone comes and collects them and takes them down to the people. I think they do about 400 meals a night.
Today’s meal is a pasta and meat sauce dish with green beans and Parmesan. Me and a mate made the meat sauce last night and it has been in the slow cooker for about 6 hours. When it gets closer to plating up I will cook the pasta, heat up the beans and then mix em all up together, plate them up nice and hot with some garnish and topped off with cheese. I test drove it last night and its banging. I think there will be enough for 25 or so nice big generous servings. I love this. It does burn through money that I really don’t have to spare but its only once a month and it makes me feel really good so it’s a worthwhile investment in that sense. I have to stop myself from going overboard or using really expensive ingredients. I have to remind myself that I am cooking for strangers… Not for a date… heh. You feel me friend?
They came out really good. Cooking the meat sauce in the slow cooker is a fucking gangster move. The lady that picked the meals up said that they really loved the smoked fish pie we did a few months back. It was cool to get some feedback because once you hand the meals over, that’s it, you don’t get reviews or anything.. The clientele has more important things to worry about than the fragile ego of a weirdo like me… they need to figure out where to sleep, what to have for breakfast tomorrow… you know? Important shit. My offsider, a mate who has been pitching in, he was here when the lady said that so it was really encouraging for us both because you always wonder if people like it or not. You know? I really love this. The meal cost about $3.60 per serving and, honestly, I saved a meal for myself and I could only eat half of it! So maybe those people at least had breakfast sorted in leftovers or at least a late night snack.
Piping hot ready to eat!
I’ve been fortunate this past year in that I’ve been privileged to work in the kitchen alongside a chef that I admire a lot. She taught me that the final meal shouldn’t need salt or pepper, the seasoning should be done in the kitchen, not at the table. It has really changed how I approach cooking.
Anyway so, here are the ingredients and method, you know, in case you feel frisky…….
1 kg Minced beef (Chicken, Lamb, Goat or pork will probably work out ok as well or in case of vegetarianism just sub the meat out for tofu, beans, egg plant, bean curd, lentils, chickpeas etc, hell even potato or kumara will work at a pinch).
4 Large Onions
1 Clove of Garlic.
5 tins of whole peeled Tomatos
200g Parmesan Cheese
1,500g Boccoli pasta (Spirals, Macaroni, spaghetti, whatever you like)
Oregano, Chilli Powder, salt, Pepper, whatever your preference
One jar of pre-made Italian meat sauce…. (Just to get the flavors authentic)
1 Kg Cross Sliced Green Beans.
1 cube of oxo lamb stock
Sour Cream (optional)
Sweat the roughly chopped Garlic, Onions, Herbs and spices in a large frying pan. Brown the meat once the onions become transparent and put it all into the crock pot/slow cooker. De-Glaze the pan to get all the flavors into the crock pot.
Add the tins of Tomato and Pasta Sauce to the mix and cook on low for six hours. Every once in a while give it a stir and break up the tomatoes as they soften. After a while all the yummy sugars from the tomato and the oil from the meat will begin to sort of pool on the top. Do it the night before and its all ready to go the next day. Super simple.
Half an hour before you want to serve it, turn the slow cooker on to high and bring it back up to a low simmer. Cook the frozen beans with a dash of salt and a cube of lamb stock (Beans are nasty, might as well make them taste as good as possible. Right?). Bring a huge pot of water to the boil with a dash of olive oil and a generous handful of salt. Cook the pasta, combine everything and serve with Parmesan, sour cream and a smile.
If you are in Hamilton and want to help get in touch with The Serve Trust, they are desperate for help. They cant get enough meals for the demand and have had their budget cut this year.
Scientists in Zurich announce that they have successfully bred a litter of Pigs that are thriving on a diet of crude oil and plastics. The animals are the result of decades of careful genetic engineering and gene sequence tweaks. The Pigs have highly advanced internal origins designed to be able to thrive on this unusual diet. Speaking to Dr. Phillis Bedweever on Friday she stated that whilst the health of the animals is promising the next phase is to try to implant the organs into Human hosts. The long term goal is two fold; combating hunger and poverty on the one hand and cleaning up the planet on the other. Future humans just may be sitting down to a meal of oil spills and discarded single use plastics. Cleaning up the environment and a healthy happy snack!
Human rights groups and antifa have been a constant threat to the program. The group of just 15 animals has had to be moved twice to secure, secret locations following an incident in 1983 in which an entire sample group as well as the laboratory was raised to the ground after PETA activists gained access with I.E.Ds. After Chinese scientists successfully transplanted a kidney grown in a porcine host into a human, hopes are high in Zurich that they could be testing human subjects within the decade. The end finally in sight for pollution and poverty.
marktupuhiblog 
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